Recovery Time From Pelvic Floor Surgery & Bladder Botox starts…

Friday: I arrived at the hospital, starving and thirsty but squeaky clean and devoid of any make up or nail varnish or even deodorant, hmmm yes I know, quite unnatural for some of us ladies…then I checked into my room. After seeing the nurses and speaking with the surgeon and the anesthetist, I then had to put on the sexy gown and surgery stockings and wait to be taken down to theatre and no we didn’t do any medical role play at that point, lol, but some naughty thoughts did pop into my head.

Doctor role play?

So now it’s time to go and kiss goodbye to Hubby, and he he gives me one of his wonderful, I love you and everythings going to be fine hugs and kisses and I walk off with the nurse towards the lift, feeling like my heartbeat is getting faster and faster all the time. I’m very nervous indeed and wonder if I am doing the right thing.

Now in the room next to the theatre, I see the anaesthetist, whom I had already met earlier on. He was very nice and friendly and actually quite hot looking in his scrubs.

I’m ready for you now Kandy.

Well now was the time to put all thoughts of embarrassment to the back of my mind, which was difficult, knowing that for the next 60 minutes or so, my legs will be akimbo and pointing to the stars with my lady bits on display to everyone in that room. Thank goodness I will be asleep… I just wanted it all over and done with now. So with the cannula in and the small talk over with, I was told I would start to feel sleepy. I looked at the clock, it was 2.30 pm…will I see the time again?

Awoken  in a different room and feeling a little fuzzy, I was being told all had gone fine and asked how did I feel? I looked around for a clock in the room, and saw that it was now 3.35 pm and I felt enormous relief.  Wheeled back to my room, where my darling hubby was waiting for me, I could see the relief and happiness beaming in his face and it made me feel really happy.

Friday night… I ate well after being starved all day and rested whilst watching TV with hubby in hospital. I Didn’t sleep much as every two hours someone was coming in to check on my bloods etc.

Saturday… The catheter came out and they had to measure my urine throughout the day and then they finished by doing a bladder scan…all was working.. in that department anyway. It would be 6 long weeks before I knew how my lady bits would handle having my hubby’s beautiful cock inside her.

Saturday night…all went well, especially when I was visited by my friend bearing gifts of vodka and rum and mixers…and a big fat joint…she had to take me  in a wheelchair to her car in the car park to have it.

Help End Marijuana Prohibition!

Arrh that’s better 🙂

I know I know, I should know better at my age. Anyway my excuse was that I needed something to help relax me so I could go to the toilet without any pain… and the joint certainly helped to do that.

Sunday afternoon…after having my bladder scanned and given the all clear and seeing the consultant, I was told I could go home, as long as I had help at home, which of course I did, thankfully.

Monday morning and It’s great to be home from the hospital and waking up in my own bed, next to my lovely husband. Although it was nice to be looked after so well by the nurses.

One Week Later…

Here I am now a week on and feeling not too bad, everything is still swollen and sore and I’m still taking pain killers but I’m also excited about how she is going to feel in five weeks time, with the prospect of all being well ‘down there’, everything from sex & exercise, to pelvic floor & bladder control will be dramatically improved, well in theory. Basically I now have a new vagina, and she will be up and ready for a test drive in 5 weeks time.

Six weeks on from surgery and its our 20th Wedding Anniversary and also the day to go and see the surgeon. With great excitement and bundles of nerves we head to the hospital, where once again, I will have to spread my legs for this man.

Yay it’s all good says the doc, go forth and take her for that test drive, haha well he didn’t actually say that but he did say “you’re good to go!” So we did, not right there in his office of course, although I was keen to get on with things. So we drove off to a 200 year old cottage in the countryside for a few romantic and naughty days together.

Bruuuum Bruuum Bruuuum  & off we go…we sure did take her for a test drive or 10!

I’m so pleased to be able to report that everything felt fine and fabulous and so did hubby’s extremely hard cock. The poor man hasn’t had sex for six weeks…and boy was he ready for it…as was I!

Home sweet home 🙂

Yes, my fanny is fine and dandy!!!

Need I say anything here?

The picture says it all! 😉

Time to celebrate!

 

A few months later…

So now here I am a few months on from the surgery and the bladder botox… I should have posted this some time ago but something called ‘Life & Teens’ and a splash of procrastination have hampered me somewhat.

So is all good with the lady bits, some of you have asked?…Yes, most definitely, is the answer. 🙂

Happy days!

 

 

Pelvic floor surgery and no sex for six weeks!

Yes, tonight is my last night of sex for 6 weeks! Arrrgh am I doing the right thing I ask myself? Yes I’m scared about the surgery, it is scary for sure. Putting your life in the hands of other people you hardly know and with your nether regions on display, whilst asleep under general anaesthetic…but I’m also scared that it might interfere with my sex life afterwards, making things uncomfortable or painful. It is something to consider when having this kind of surgery, and especially because I love sex so much. Anyway I’m here now and I’m not turning back.

So it’s the eve of my surgery and even though I know what to expect, as I had the same procedure 8 years ago, I’m feeling pretty nervous. Everything was fine up until about a year ago, when I started to get the same symptoms again, you know the sort fellow ladies, having to rush to the toilet more often, often in the middle of the supermarket shop, and hoping you can make it to the toilet before you wet your knickers…avoiding the kids trampoline like the plague…and going for a wee before you go anywhere, just in case, etc etc.

So I decided to go back to my gynaecologist and ask for surgery again. I had been trying all sorts of things to try to restore my pelvic floor muscles. I have been squeezing my pelvic floor muscles at every opportunity and tried various gadgets but to only get a small improvement. Also, when it came to having sex with my husband, (for me anyway) I was not able to ‘feel’ him so well in certain positions, but some were better than others but…I wanted things to be back to how they used to be.

So like I did last night 😉 I’m going to make the most of my last night of sex for 6 weeks and get plenty of the old, in out in out!
So wish me luck and hopefully all will go well and I can come back with a happy vagina and blog about it sometime soon.

Here’s hoping that in six weeks time she will be ready for my darling hubby, with all guns blazing! 😉

KS

A funny love poem

I wish I could say I wrote this funny poem but I didn’t, but it’s definitely one worth sharing.

KS.

GUILTY! When the long arm of the law doesn’t tickle your fancy.

GUILTY!

After hearing about the fact that we have some very weird laws regarding sex/intimacy all around the world, I decided to investigate and so here are my top 10 weirdos.

1) On the wrong tracks!
Seems like a miscarriage of justice – but lovers face fines for kissing on Austria’s trains.The £42 penalties were brought in to prevent “discourteous behaviour” after moans that amorous passengers were losing track of common decency. Conductors also have the power to kick offending couples off the train.

2) Just married!
Honeymooners would be wise to avoid hiring a car in Eboli, Italy, just south of Naples… because kissing in a moving vehicle here can carry a fine of up to £415.

3) In hot water!
In 1985, officials in Swaziland banned couples from making love in a hot spring called Cuddle Puddle. Ministers threatened couples with fines and even jail for “having sexual intercourse underwater”.

4) A step too far!
Under a centuries-old law, couples in Birmingham, Alabama, can be fined for disorderly conduct if they have sex “on the steps of any church after the sun goes down”.
But the law says nothing about getting intimate in daylight. 😉

5) Wild about animals!
An antiquated law in Iran that’s still on the statute books permits men to have sex with certain types of domestic animals. But it forbids any sexual contact with wild animals – particularly lionesses.
Also..In Lebanon, men are legally allowed to have sex with animals, but the animals must be female. Having sexual relations with a male animal is punishable by death.

6) Blinking Barmy
In Ottumwa, Iowa, men are banned from winking at women they don’t know while they are within the city limits.

7) Just a small one
The married women of La Paz, Bolivia, are allowed to sip just one glass of wine in a public bar or restaurant. The ruling claims that women who have more than that to drink are “morally and ­sexually lax”, and they can be divorced by their husbands if they are caught over-indulging.

8) Baaaa none
Most Middle Eastern countries recognize the following Islamic law: “After having sexual relations with a lamb, it is a mortal sin to eat its flesh.”

9) She came with a bang!
In Connorsville, Wisconsin, it’s illegal for a man to shoot off a gun when his female partner has an orgasm.

10) Beep beep beep!
It’s safe to make love while parked in Coeur d’Alene, Idaho. Police officers aren’t allowed to walk up and knock on the window. Any suspicious officer who thinks that sex is taking place must drive up from behind, honk his horn three times and wait approximately two minutes before getting out of his car to investigate.

Well I just can’t get my breath at number 8, words fail me!!…and as for number 9, I think I would like the sound of my partner shooting his gun (if he had one) when I have an orgasm, it would be a sign of his celebration and excitement at my ravenous primal bucking. (He does love to see me come.)  Although I don’t think the neighbours would like it, disturbing them two or three times a night, seven days a week! 😉

Never heard it called hooking before

Love is…

Masturbation, squirting, orgasms etc – My Friday five

After scouring the murky depths of the internet all week, looking into all things sex related, my mind has been overloaded with so much interesting, informative and of course hot information that there is out there, it’s hard to know where to start.

So I have decided to start a collection called ‘My Friday Five’ where I will bring together my top five websites or nuggets of information, advice or amusement , that I have found that week. There may be a theme to it or it may just be a jumble of unrelated naughtiness. Either way I hope it will be informative, beneficial and sometimes amusing to all who read it.

This week, for my Friday five, I have been looking into the G-Spot, squirting and masturbation and it’s goal of course, of a magnificent orgasm or two or three or four. 😉

So check these out below.

No.1
Check out both parts for some great info on the G-Spot and squirting.
http://betweenthesheetssa.com/2013/08/20/femaleejaculation1/
and
http://betweenthesheetssa.com/2013/08/22/femaleejaculation2

No.2
After looking into Tantra I came across this YouTube clip, after watching it and hearing about 8 different types of orgasm, I’m even more interested in learning about Tantra and Tantric sex.

No.3
Just an interesting nugget.
http://goodvibesblog.com/la-petite-mort-french-orgasm

No.4
Invaluable information for your man to help you orgasm in a new way.
http://www.womenshealthmag.co.uk/sex-love/sex-tips/227/your-15-minute-orgasm/

No.5
Well I thought I had seen it all and that they have given us all the game shows possible on TV but this is just unbelievable!
http://guyism.com/entertainment/tv/orgasm-wars-insane-game-show-ever.html

So that’s my Friday five for the week.
Enjoy.
KS.

Great reasons to have more sex.

There are many great reasons to have more sex in your lives, and one of them is very appropriate at the moment. It is as you know the month of November and here in the UK it is also called ‘Movember.’ Movember challenges men to grow a moustache for the 30-days of November, thereby changing their appearance and the face of men’s health. The aim is to raise vital funds and raise awareness for prostate and testicular cancer and mental health. Prostate cancer is the most common cancer in men and is the second largest cause of male cancer deaths in UK. Every hour one man dies from prostate cancer and over 40,000 men are diagnosed with prostate cancer every year. It’s estimated that by 2030, prostate cancer will be the most common cancer.

Movember’s not just for men. The women of Movember, are known as Mo Sistas. They play a vital role in the success of Movember by supporting and encouraging the men in their life to get involved. Mo Sistas also get involved by signing up at Movember.com, and participate by raising funds and awareness themselves. Essentially, Mo Sistas do everything that Mo Bros do, just without a Mo.

So why have more sex do you say, well it is so you can reduce your man’s risk of prostate cancer.  An epidemiological study of 30,000 American men by Michael Leitzman, a cancer researcher at the National Cancer Institute in Bethesda, Maryland, has found that men who enjoy an active sex life do not risk prostate cancer in later life.

Leitzmann’s findings were that men who ejaculate between 13 and 20 times a month had a 14% lower risk of prostate cancer that men who ejaculated on average, between 4 and 7 times a month for most of their adult life. Men who ejaculated upwards of 21 times a month had a 33% lower lifetime risk of prostate cancer than the baseline group.They say cancer-causing chemicals could build up in the prostate if men do not ejaculate regularly. So men, you need to be ejaculating  more than five times a week and then you will be a third less likely to develop prostate cancer later in life. What great news !

So people, go forth and have more sex, (safe sex of course) and/or masturbate as much as possible, this week and every week to cum 😉 to protect yourself or your partner from prostate cancer and have lots of fun at the same time.

KS.

JADE EGGS

After reading this great post on the benefits of using Jade eggs, I felt I must share this most valuable information. Who doesn’t want to improve their sex life and health at the same time. As many women, particularly those who have given birth or are older, will know that our PC muscles can be a problem. I’m off to purchase myself some Jade eggs and hopefully will report back that indeed they do do what they are supposed to do. 😉

KS.

The Goddess of Sacred Sex

JADE EGGS serve as a key tool for awakening and cultivating sexual energy!

Your life will dramatically change after just a few short weeks doing daily exercise with your new Jade Eggs. No matter which stage of life you are at, exercising your yoni is just as important as hitting the gym, the yoga studio or the dance floor. A personal responsibility to your body and your well-being in today’s day and age is paramount. And the benefits are limitless.

Jade eggs improve the muscular strength of the vagina. Each use will increase the tone of the muscles so you that will:
1.  Feel more grounded and centred in yourself
2.  Be more in tune with your sensuality
3.  Massage your yoni from the inside
4.  Increase your flow of sexual hormones
5.  Develop stronger orgasms
6.  Heighten the responsiveness of your G-spot
7.  Maintain healthy reproductive organs
8.  Prevent…

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Woohoo! My first published erotic poem.

I’m pleased to say that recently, I had one of my erotic Poems published on a fellow bloggers site called pittsburghflashfictiongazette.com

Why not check the site out, as there are some very good erotic stories and articles on there, as well as my poem of course. 😉
My poem ‘A night of passion’ is listed under top posts and pages and erotic poetry or you can link to it from here.
http://pittsburghflashfictiongazette.com/erotic-poetry-an-evening-of-passion-by-kandy-sparks/

Thank you to the editor Guy Hogan, for that burst of confidence you have given me by publishing my poem on your great site.
KS.x

Zurich introduces ‘drive-in’ sex

I just came across this article on the BBC news website and thought I would share it, as to me it seems like a great idea.
Zurich introduces ‘drive-in’ sex.
See this link for the full story : http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-europe-23839358

We all know that prostitution is one of the oldest professions or as some would say, the oldest oppressions in the world, but we all know it will never disappear. So it makes sense to me to legalise it, (as Switzerland, Germany and the Uk and some other countries have done.) and make it a safer ‘working’ environment.
See this link : http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Prostitution_by_country

We need to put measures in place to help protect those that have to, or want to do it, especially when there are so many that get raped or assaulted.
There is also the problem of sexually transmitted diseases, drug taking, unwanted pregnancies and the fact that we don’t want it visible on our streets for the young and innocent to see on a daily basis.
Some Facts:
More than half of UK women in prostitution have been raped and/or seriously sexually assaulted. At least three quarters have been physically assaulted (Home Office 2004b))

A global study of prostitution found that 9 out of 10 women in prostitution would like to exit if they could (Farley, 2003).

Up to 95% of women in prostitution are problematic drug users, including around 78% heroin users and rising numbers of crack cocaine addicts (Home Office 2004a).

So going back to the original topic, I think Zurich have launched a great project with its ‘Drive-in’ sex with it’s custom-built compound on an industrial site in the Zurich suburbs. I like the fact that on the driver’s side, the boxes are very narrow, making it difficult for him to get out of the car. On the passenger side, there is plenty of space, an alarm button and an emergency exit.
There will also be a security guard at the main entrance and safe-sex reminders: There will also be a big HIV prevention advertisement right in front of the car, so the driver has to look at a condom, to remind him he should wear one and just a few steps from the boxes, there will be a set of Portakabins where counsellors are on hand, together with a kitchen, toilets and a shower.
The new regulations will also require prostitutes to purchase a daily sex workers license for a nominal fee, and have health insurance.
So all in all a great set up which will hopefully prove to be beneficial to the prostitutes, clients and the people of the city. If it is a success then maybe other cities and countries will follow suit.
Well done Zurich I say.
Bur what do you say?
KS.x